Taking Care of Our Bodies Helps with Better Sex

By paying attention to our health and fitness, we can improve our sex and erotic lives.

I’ve been writing about sex for more than three decades. In that time, I’ve offered a wide variety of information and advice about how to have better sex – mostly of the kinky variety – but I’ve written about more mainstream sexuality topics too.

Most of the advice I’ve offered is sound. At least I think so. Whether it’s been discussing certain kinks or their related techniques, or the overall radical set of sexuality communities, I’ve covered a lot of territory.

That said, something that’s often been on my mind but I’ve hesitated to write about is that taking care of ourselves physically likely leads to better sex and erotic play.

Some might claim I’m being lookist with this opinion. In “Lookism in Erotic Subcutlures,” I wrote about how there are forces within maverick sexual subcultures who are pushing against lookism.

I’ve always seen examples of lookism in certain communities like kink and leather, but thankfully at the same time I’m nowadays seeing a concerted effort to broaden imagery and messaging to be more inclusive of various types of people. This is a positive development.

But embracing a diversity of types of people doesn’t negate the fact that there’s a certain amount of science behind taking care of ourselves and being able to perform physically and better enjoy the pleasures of our erotic endeavors.

While the article is focused on older readers and centered around coupledom, “7 Tips to Strengthen Your Sex Life” by Nicole Pajer outlines some science-backed advice to improve one’s sex life.

We took a peek under the sheets and discovered some unexpected habits that have nothing to do with your relationship and can help any couple regain their romantic mojo.

My reading audience spans the spectrum of single to monogamously coupled to nonmonogamous to polyamorous and just about any other type of relationship configuration and the sexualities that accompany them. Regardless of who’s reading this, I think the advice Pajer offers is something we can all benefit from.

Pajer suggests we do the following to help with our sex lives and it’s all fairly basic stuff, but nonetheless I think it’s important to highlight it since the entire point of this newsletter is to improve people’s erotic lives and their relationships.

• Get plenty of sleep. Seven to nine hours is a good amount. Consider not bringing your phone to bed.

• Avoid crash diets. Simply aim for a well-balanced diet comprised of healthier foods. Your body needs the energy food provides to enjoy the sex you want to have.

• Get enough vitamin D. As someone who has a dermatologist who encourages me to avoid sun as much as possible, supplements are useful if you avoid the sun too.

• Exercise. Walk. Do calisthenics. Do chair or bed exercises if you are limited to a chair or bed. Lift weights. Move your body as much as you can and add in some weight resistance exercises. Personally, I love doing yoga and that’s my main form of non-walking physical exercise.

• Avoid late-night sweets. Evidently, sugar before bed can cause insulin to be released and temporarily suppress testosterone levels.

• Drink lots of water. Since I’m writing this post from Palm Springs where the current temperature is 107 degrees Fahrenheit, staying hydrated is on my mind. But most of us should drink more water than we do.

• As for making the bed daily, I doubt that’s a habit I’ll take on. Never really have my entire life. That said, the part about a cluttered home potentially impacting us and therefore our sex lives is real and my recent habit of constantly purging and minimizing my possessions has proven helpful.

Let me finish by saying one can be healthy and still be on the heavier or lean side of the body type spectrum. Everyone will have physical limitations that might impede their ability to exercise or do certain exercises. Lifestyle realities can sometimes make it difficult to abide by all the advice given here. But it’s ultimately difficult to conclude anything other than being in better physical health will benefit your sex and erotic life.

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